Her Dirty Dancing
Operation “Her Dirty Dancing” to assassinate Liberty
took 35 million Galactic Credits and lots of planning
When Liberty was training in the desert with her
friends of the Cave Tribe, all the while a phenomenon
developed that was nicknamed “The Bald Squad.” It
wasn’t really a squad but a phenomenon whereby a
selected team of mercenaries was constantly kept busy
trying to assassinate Liberty.
When they fail, and it happens all the time, it is
always a shameful, exhausting fail. This is despite
(maybe thanks to) the fact that she’s not aware of the
attempts to kill her.
She just acts her natural actions – and fails them
offhand. When each such operation gets to its
terminating fail, those selected for the team are
always so frustrated that they pull their hair out.
And so, operation after operation, they become balder
and balder and that’s why they became the laughing
stock called “The Bald Squad.”
Without an active gland it was no longer possible to
locate Liberty by electronic means. The Spycraft was
recruited to help and Billy G. received another fake
bonus to write a special program for the Golden Eye’s
computers: software to collect every piece of
information that might be connected to Liberty.
Including the color of her hair, her estimated body
size, her expected moves around the desert – and any
other clue that might hint of her whereabouts (for
instance, a local concentration of glands out of
control). Gradually, a database was formed that kept
on growing by the day.
Liberty got no idea of the trap quickly growing,
sneaking up on her.
When the “Baldies” locate suspect girls of the Cave
Tribe (remember – no glands) they eliminate them, only
to find out that none of them was her. The
assassinations are always disguised as accidents, so
she doesn’t notice or not sure even when it seems odd.
Her good friend Petra was found wounded and shocked
down an old well and saved just in the nick of time.
She, Petra, was not an airhead but a careful girl who
took good care of herself.
Liberty starts to suspect that something’s not right,
but is still not aware that the arrows are aimed at
her – and only her. She FEELS protected and this by
itself protects her to a large degree.
The origins of Operation “Her Dirty Dancing”
Just before the decision to initiate this operation:
the Golden Eye locates Liberty with high probability,
sends down a color photo of her in the early morning
standing near a cave opening. The photo arrives at
Snake’s desk as he has previously ordered.
Snakes squeezes the intercom button: “BILLY – URGENT CONFERENCE! GET
YOUR ASS OVER HERE ON THE DOUBLE!!”
An idea is brought up that Billy should make a
hologram of a man who would attract Liberty so they
can catch her in a large and strong trap. Billy
explains: “Listen Snakes, she’s a growing gal, you can
work on her hormones without no glands. You send her a
hologram of the sexiest man in the Galaxy, she loses
it I’m tellin ya. I make you an awesome hologram at
half price. We’ll call this operation dirty dancing or
something. It will get her out in the open and then
you catch her with a trap made of thick rope, no, you
know what, steel. Steel trap! Gotta work man.”
Poison is listening.
But she must be eliminated right after her capture and
a short interrogation, the snake stresses!
Why? Because a legend has developed among the pyramid
tribes, an elaborate legend of a child-heroine who
dared to revolt and ran away to her death in the
desert. That legend eats up badly into the sacred
authority of the gland and Psychography; even the
religious leaders feel erosion of their power to
threat and control. Therefore she must be prevented at
all cost from returning back – now grown up and
without an active glad for some odd reason – to the
Broken Pyramid.
That said, Snakes wants to be right there despite the
risk: they are going to point a new powerful weapon to
their prey. He simply cannot trust the Baldies. He
also can’t “trust this Billy and his nonsense” to
properly write and operate the hologram. Then the idea
arises that he, Snakes himself, would disguise as the
sexy man.
“OK, but now how do I show her my real shape without
making her run away at the critical moment? Billy the Nilly – what say you?
THINK FAST I’M CRAZY MAD NOW.”
Billy suggests implanting a hologram of a Tabascus
Forte* in the chest of the disguised Snakes: “Will
cost ya only half a million not including the bonus.
You expose your chest while dancing and she’s all
yours I’m tellin ya.”
*Tabascus Forte, if
you really need to know, is the name of Snake’s
species. Generally shaped like our Cobra but at
least 3000 times more venomous. This species
proliferates on Snake Planet where it had already
bitten all the other species, so now it must leech
on distant species to survive. Well you can’t eat
lettuce all day can you.
And so it happened that Billy G. writes the computer
program and builds up the holographic image of a hunky
and muscular blond guy, to train Snakes for his sneaky
role. The snake learns the hologram, not without
furious anger (he wanted to bite it on several
occasions but what can you do to a virtual man),
trains hours and days until he completely assumes the
costume. He starts to use it outside, according to the
planned steps.
He rides a horse: a cool (fake) man on a cool (fake)
horse…
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